The Silver Spring Penguin

Criminal craziness in the third police district declined in the first three months of 2009, compared with the same time last year, according to numbers published last week by the MoCo police department.

The largest percentage drop was in the district’s murder rate. Last year, one person was murdered between January and March. Compare that with a big, fat zero murders that went down between the same months this year. That’s a 100-percent decrease.

There was also a decent decrease in theft from automobiles — try a 47-percent drop, baby. In the first quarter of last year, 240 cars were snagged in the third district. During the same time this year, that number sank to 128 vehicles.

However, some crime rates experienced a year-over-year increase: assault (ass kicking; up by almost 7 percent), robbery (theft with an ass kicking or the threat of an ass kicking; 3 percent) and larceny (theft without the ass kicking; 4 percent)

When all rates were crunched together — including those for rape and burglary — the third district experienced a 9-percent year-over-year drop in crime.

The third district includes Silver Spring’s central business district and stretches from Eastern Avenue to the Howard County line.