The Silver Spring Penguin

Around this time each year, local governments produce videos warning of the dangers of fireworks. They blast watermelons and mannequins into oblivion, and set clothing afire to demonstrate the inherent risks.

Not one to miss out on the explosive fun, Montgomery County’s fire and rescue services has filmed its own flick in which a cantaloupe, watermelon and a raw chicken fall prey to fireworks. Slow-motion footage further emphasizes the fucking coolness — er, the terrible destruction — that the typical firecracker can unleash with one flick of a Bic.

Take-home message: Blowing shit up is dangerous and illegal in Montgomery County. Pyromaniacs are better off catching the Fourth of July fireworks at the Takoma Park Middle School (7611 Piney Branch Rd, Takoma Park) at 9:30 p.m.

Video courtesy of Montgomery County fire and rescue services.